Dance Better Now

Dance Step Tutorials

 

Have you been dancing for a while and found that you’re still learning, have issues or maybe even feel that you have more issues with your dancing than you used to? You might even be searching the internet for dance step tutorials so that you can find something that you’re missing, and then master your dance. Well you’re certainly not alone. Many of us are trying to find something that will make us feel that we are improving faster or at a rate that fits with our expectations of ourselves. We do this because sometimes we’re unlearning what we thought was good dancing. We also do it because dance has started to become a challenge when once it was more fun, and we want that fun back

Why does dance progress in such an odd way?

 The reason for these issues is that dancing is actually taught wrong. At the beginning you’re taught basic steps with little attention to proper styling of subtle requirements. Or you might focus on easier dances such as merengue, which often gives a quick sense of achievement.

 When this happens you have a lower standard to reach. You go along happily picking these new steps thinking all is fine. However, it is not. You dance teacher is actually allowing you to develop a lot of bad habits. Because they do not control what you do, you will start moving your body in whatever way feels good, comfortable or normal to you. The chances of this movement being the same as what is expected at a higher level are very low. 

This means that you will spend some time (maybe years) training your body to dance a way it’s not meant to. That’s how you end up with bad habits that need to be unlearned, that’s how you end up finding dance less fun and more challenging and that’s why you end up searching the internet for dance step tutorials and hoping you’ll find that secret to dancing better.

So what is the most effective way to learn dance?

 The question of the best way to learn is not unique to dance. It is actually something that has been considered in many other areas. Let’s consider three different areas: martial arts, engineering and public speaking. That’s a pretty diverse group of activities.

 Many of us remember the ‘wax on, wax off’ of the first karate kid movie.  Poor Ralph Macchio had to do that for hours (plus many other chores) before he could get into any ‘real’ training.

 

 What about engineering? Would you feel safe if an engineer’s first lesson was desiging a bridge that you were about to drive over? Probably not. You’d want them to have learnt how to calculate stress in the bridge and ensure that the stress will not be greater than the bridge material can handle. That’s why engineers need to complete a degree first.

 So now what about public speaking? Have you seen The King’s Speech? King Georg VI of Britain needs to overcome a speech problem so that he can speak in public. A lot of his training has little to do with public speaking before he actually tries it.

 

 The common theme you have seen here is that it is more efficient to take time building the attributes that allow us to do something as opposed to simply doing that something. The same is true of dance (pretty much anything really). We should start by developing our musicality, our body’s dexterity and grace, and our ability to feel another body so that we may lead and follow.

 However, we know that dance isn’t taught like that. This is why you now probably have problems and why you are looking for dance step tutorials on the internet. You’re dealing with all this baggage that comes from being taught how to dance the wrong way.

 Why do we learn like this? That’s a very good question and the easiest way to answer it is to think back to when you started to dance. It was fun wasn’t it? It was also social – unlike martial arts, engineering and public speaking. And it was important that you could do something worthwhile at the start, otherwise why would you go to class. It really is vital to have some small wins at the start. We learn dance this way so that we enjoy it. It is the wrong way to learn, but it is the best way.

What should you do?

 Now that you know you are learning the wrong way, but it is the best way, you need to take action. The fact that you have come to this page is a good sign – it shows that you have already realised this and you’ve decided to be proactive. They best thing to do now is look at building attributes. Focus on the following as you see fit:

• Increasing musicality – there are a lot of resources that focus on musicality specifically, and you can find them with an internet search

• Improving body movement – there are a lot of resources to help with this too, and they can also be found with an internet search

• Accepting that you will need to unlearn dance habits (which might look like a drop in dance ability) and learn new (and better) dance habits

Is your dance partner lying to you?

Earlier today I was re-reading Partner Dance Success: Be the One They Want: What I Wish I Knew when I Started Social Dancing by Don Baarns. It’s good to re-read what you have about dance instead of always buying more books. Often new books will tell you the same thing and re-reading  what you have will remind you of key things you have forgotten or reveal important things you missed last time. It’s also cheaper too.

However, that’s not the point of the post; just something I thought I would share.

This post is about how honest people will be with you when you talk to them about how you dance. This was a section of Don’s book. As he points out, people will always be polite when talking to you face to face. However, they will say all sorts of negative things about you behind your back.

Why does this happen?

Well first off, just think about the times you have done this. And then think about the times when you think others have done it to you.

Most likely, you were being polite. As your mother said “If you can’t say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all.”

Most of the time this helps us maintain a civil and functioning society. Skirting over the little things prevents people losing their temper, getting upset and then maybe getting into a fight. Chances are others were being polite when they lied to you too. Makes sense really.

But politeness like this doesn’t help you dance better!

The objectivity that we share with each other about other people is what will help people dance better. Once you know what problems you have – and we all have them – you can fix it and become an even better dancer. The dancer who gets told about problems and then fixes them is going to dance much better than the dancer who is continually being dishonestly lied to about how good they are.

Now what can we take from this.

First, honesty would probably be appreciated (in the long run) from others so we should try a bit more of it. However, you probably still have the sense of wanting to be nice and keeping everyone happy. That just means that you need to be more positive by talking about how much better someone can get and be constructive.

So how to be positive? Instead of saying to someone that there timing is poor, you can say that if the focus on hitting each note consistently, then they will have really great flow to their dance.

To be constructive, focus on the source of the problem and how to fix it. Try saying something like, “try being a bit more resistive when a give an arm lead” then see what happens. You can also be part of the issue so that you’re in it together “I feel like I am lost and not sure where is best to step next when I am lead through that underarm turn.” This sentence raises the possibility that you are missing something so it’s not really a case of you pointing the finger at another person. It also gives the other person something more to work with: either then or with a teacher later on.

Second, extract information from others. Don’t ask questions like “was that good?” These questions are always going to be answered with “yes” if you are good or just ok. They will be answered with “It was ok” or “not bad” if it’s bad. Try asking about something you’re worried about. And leave the window open for feedback. Try questions like: Do I seem off time; Was that figure different from what I was meant to do; Did that lead leave you unsure what I wanted; I could be standing up straighter couldn’t I? These questions make it much easier (or more comfortable) to give useful feedback while remaining polite.

In summary, be honest with others in a polite way by focusing on the benefits and trying to find the cause of an issue and use specific questions that lead the other person to give feedback that is actually useful to you.